Monstrous Monday: Pink Dragon

So, when the blog went into hiatus, I had been wrestling with the Pink Dragon. I was trying to combine two different pink dragons from comedy articles:

• The pink (candy) dragon from Rick Reid's scenario “The Caves of Confection,” in Polyhedron issue #051 (January 1990).
• The pink dragon from Jeanne McGuire's entry in Not Necessarily the Monstrous Compendium in Dragon #156 (April 1990).

Both of these had humor elements, but still had (I judged) some gameplay value and I felt it would be good to combine them into one fully-fleshed out creature. But making a full stat block for a new type of dragon in D&D 5E is hard. You can go simple for Lair and Legendary Actions, but that feels like a cheap copout. And I'm a huge fan of Spectre Creation's Cosmic Dragon Breviary, and in that one he statted out five full new species, with new Lair and Legendary Actions. So, when I came back to the blog, I felt I needed to finish this guy before moving on; he'd been waiting long enough. [2023-05-23: Edited.]

Pink Dragon

The oddest and least malevolent of the chromatic dragons, pink dragons live in desolate coastal regions far from the haunts of other dragons. They enjoy conversation and witty banter but can be short-tempered, especially with those who do not laugh at their coarse jokes and pranks.

Many adventurers have been lulled into complacency by the dragon’s somewhat ridiculous appearance. Small pink scales cover their backs and sides, shading to white on the belly. Their large eyes goggle comically from their narrow heads, while their bat-like wings are slender and graceful.

When it hatches the dragon has light pink scales. As it ages its scales become darker and more vibrant; particularly ancient pink dragons can be mistaken for red dragons, but a few minutes of conversation easily determines the difference.

An Odd Diet and An Odder Result. Pink dragons are omnivorous, consuming a wide variety of meat and vegetable matter. They supplement this diet with limestone, which they gouge out of the walls of their coastal cavern lairs. The territory of a pink dragon can be readily identified by these gouge-marks.

Internally, the dragon’s body processes these minerals and produces two different breath weapons from the results. The first is a cloud of blinding, stinging bubbles. While not damaging, the cloud can prove effective in blinding opponents; the dragon’s own eyes are protected by nictating membranes which seal them against the bubbles.

The second is even stranger: a rapidly-hardening substance similar to quicklime, which encases objects in a hard shell. Pink dragons frequently use this breath weapon to incapacitate threatening creatures; the dragon can then flee, or bring the creature back to its lair to deal with it in a more tactically-favorable environment.

Foils and Patsies. Pink dragons enjoy the company of other dragons, a feeling which is not mutual. The typical pink dragon is an inveterate prankster and lover of bad jokes, and regales its companions at every opportunity. As a result, other dragons usually give pink dragons a wide berth.

On rare occasions, pink dragons might be served by creatures that also call their desolate coastlines home, such as sahuagin or crab folk (see Mordenkainen's Fiendish Folio, pg 6). These alliances rarely last, as pink dragons find such creatures “dull and joyless.”

Due partially to their somewhat-ridiculous appearance, pink dragons do not engender fear in other creatures until they reach a very old age.

A Love of Sweets. Maybe due to their odd diet, pink dragons almost universally adore sweet confections and similar food items. Some coastal communities have successfully convinced pink dragons to leave them in peace with yearly deliveries of pastries and cakes; other times, a bakery might find itself raided by a pink dragon suffering a savage craving to satisfy its sweet tooth.

A Pink Dragon’s Lair

Pink dragons dwell in desolate coastal regions on the fringes of civilization. A pink dragon’s lair is a seaside cave or ruin, with deep limestone chambers where the dragon replenishes itself. The lair contains scattered pools and tunnels, but there will also be a storage chamber, cool and dry, where the drag-on can keep baked goods and books ⁠— these dragons enjoy reading comedies and collections of jokes and riddles.

Lair Actions

On initiative count 20 (losing initiative ties), the dragon takes a lair action to cause one of the following effects; the dragon can't use the same effect two rounds in a row:

• Pools of water that the dragon can see within 120 feet of it produce clouds of soapy bubbles that erupt and then scatter. Any creature on the ground within 10 feet of such a pool must succeed on a DC 15 Dexterity saving throw or be blinded until the end of their next turn. The area is heavily obscured for the remainder of the round.
• Manic cackling that seems to echo out of the deeper recesses of the lair grows into shrieks and peals of uncontrollable laughter, ringing in the ears of interlopers. All creatures in the lair other than pink dragons must make a DC 19 Wisdom saving throw. On a failure, the creature takes 14 (4d6) psychic damage and is stunned until the end of the dragon's next turn; on a successful save, the creature takes half as much damage and is not stunned.
• Cotton-candy-like webs spin up suddenly to fill the area. The candy is difficult terrain and lightly obscures the area. Creatures other than pink dragons that start their turn in the area or that enter it during their turn must make DC 19 Dexterity saving throws. On a failed save, a creature is restrained as long as it remains in the web or until breaking free. A restrained creature can use its action to make a DC 19 Strength check to free itself. The webs dissolve at the end of the round.

Regional Effects

The region containing a legendary pink dragon's lair is warped by the dragon’s magic, which creates one or more of the following effects:

• Shallow bodies of water (less than 20 feet deep) within 6 miles of the lair become fizzy, as if they were carbonated. Strength (Athletics) checks to swim have the DC increased by 5, and vessels which depend on buoyancy to float and enter the area of effect rapidly sink to the bottom.
• Jokes told within 1 mile of the lair seem funnier, and events seem less serious. Creatures not immune to the charmed condition have their attitude improved by 1 step.
• Food in a 10-mile radius of the lair slowly changes, losing nutritional content and developing a hard candy shell. All food items are only half as nutritious, so twice as many rations need to be consumed to stave off hunger. In addition, food-based magic is also affected; creatures must eat 2 goodberries to restore 1 hit point and receive 1 day’s nourishment, for instance, and only six creatures can take part in a heroes’ feast in the region affected.

If the dragon dies, jokes become less funny immediately and the fizziness of water fades over 1d10 days, but food items remain less nutritious until they are consumed.